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90RSrocks Member

Joined: 10 Jan 2004 Posts: 421 Location: Klamath Falls, Oregon
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Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2005 8:24 am Post subject: Cheesy joke of the day |
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It's an oldie but a goodie:
A man was ordered by his doctor to lose 75 lbs due to very serious health risks.
As he wondered how in the heck he would ever do it, he ran across an ad in the newspaper for a GUARANTEED WEIGHT LOSS PROGRAM. "Guaranteed. Yeah right!" he thought to himself. But desperate, he calls them up and subscribes to the 3-day /10 pound weight loss program.
The next day there's a knock at his door, and when he answers, there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19-year-old young lady dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign round her neck. She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me!"
Without a second thought he takes off after her.
A few miles later, huffing and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her. After they are through and she leaves, he thinks to himself, "I like the way this company does business!" The same girl shows up for the next two days and the same thing happens. On the fourth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10 lbs as promised.
He calls the company and orders their 5- day /20 pound program. The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life, wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you catch me, you can have me." He's out the door or after her like a shot. This girl is in excellent shape and it takes him a while to catch her, but when he does, it is worth every cramp and wheeze.
For the next four days, the same routine happens. Much to his delight, on the fifth day, he weighs himself and found he has lost another 20 lbs, as promised. He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day / 50 pound program.
"Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone. "This is our most rigorous program."
"Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in years."
The next day there's a knock at the door and when he opens it he finds a muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads, "If I catch you....you're mine." |
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Wolffy Member
Joined: 22 Jan 2004 Posts: 375 Location: Spokane
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Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2005 9:15 am Post subject: |
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that is so wrong, especailly when u first wake up
im still cleaning the coffee off my laptop |
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Jess Administrator
Joined: 24 Nov 2003 Posts: 429 Location: Mount Vernon, WA
1988 Pontiac Formula
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Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2005 12:58 pm Post subject: |
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| Wolfy's_88IrocZ28 wrote: | that is so wrong, especailly when u first wake up
im still cleaning the coffee off my laptop |
I can picture you cleaning the laptop... Grumbling "Damn Kelly and his nasty joke..."  _________________ '88 Formula
'95 Trans Am - Sold
'88 GTA - Sold
'89 Firebird V6 - Sold |
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ET phone hoME Member
Joined: 13 Mar 2005 Posts: 237 Location: Oregon
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Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2005 7:17 pm Post subject: |
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haha i bet he lost the 50 lbs! _________________ 1990 Camaro RS, Black w/ Red Int, V6 3.1L, Auto, T-Tops. |
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90RSrocks Member

Joined: 10 Jan 2004 Posts: 421 Location: Klamath Falls, Oregon
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Posted: Wed Mar 30, 2005 3:25 am Post subject: |
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I know I would have... All ya need is the proper motivation!  |
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Twilightoptics Hardcore (12sec Club)

Joined: 13 Jan 2004 Posts: 9191 Location: Auburn , WA
1987 Chevrolet Camaro IROC-Z
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Posted: Wed Mar 30, 2005 7:02 am Post subject: |
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| LMAO. Good one Kelly! |
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Midnight Sun Member
Joined: 10 Jan 2004 Posts: 606 Location: Ellensurg, Washington Name: Eric Haugland
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Posted: Wed Mar 30, 2005 8:46 pm Post subject: |
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| Jess wrote: | | Wolfy's_88IrocZ28 wrote: | that is so wrong, especailly when u first wake up
im still cleaning the coffee off my laptop |
I can picture you cleaning the laptop... Grumbling "Damn Kelly and his nasty joke..."  |
"Negative Ghostwriter the pattern is full." _________________
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Dewey316 The Lama

Joined: 08 Jan 2004 Posts: 7295 Location: Bringing the tech
1990 Chevrolet Camaro RS
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Posted: Wed Mar 30, 2005 10:28 pm Post subject: |
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| Midnight Sun wrote: | | Jess wrote: | | Wolfy's_88IrocZ28 wrote: | that is so wrong, especailly when u first wake up
im still cleaning the coffee off my laptop |
I can picture you cleaning the laptop... Grumbling "Damn Kelly and his nasty joke..."  |
"Negative Ghostwriter the pattern is full." |
Damnit, thats twice.... I want some butts!!! |
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