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Life Learnings

 
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Schultzy89GTA
M.R.A. (11sec Club)


Joined: 08 Jan 2004
Posts: 4417
Location: Gresham, OR

1989 Pontiac GTA

PostPosted: Sat Dec 18, 2004 9:24 am    Post subject: Life Learnings Reply with quote

This may be stale for some of you but I thought I would post anyway. I think that most of us reading this board can relate to #3. #2 is just way to close to my professional life for my comfort Wink


Things That Took Me Over 30 Years to Learn by Dave Barry

1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, nor will it ever achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings".

3. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."

4. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share
yours with them.

5. You should not confuse your career with your life.

6. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

7. Never lick a steak knife.

8. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.

9. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we
observe daylight savings time.

10. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

11. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.

12. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion,
economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.

13. A person, who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person. (This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails.)

14. Your friends love you anyway.

15. Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.

16. Men are like fine wine they start out as grapes, and it's up to the women to stomp the crap out of them until they turn into someone acceptable with whom to have dinner.


-Schultzy

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rjmcgee
The Hammer


Joined: 08 Jan 2004
Posts: 2328



PostPosted: Sat Dec 18, 2004 11:48 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Nice, #12 for me. Burnout
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Twilightoptics
Hardcore (12sec Club)


Joined: 13 Jan 2004
Posts: 9191
Location: Auburn , WA

1987 Chevrolet Camaro IROC-Z

PostPosted: Sat Dec 18, 2004 5:17 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I dig #15. Amatuers rock! Hooray for the youngin's! Cool
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Demon
12sec Club


Joined: 09 Jan 2004
Posts: 1189
Location: You're not worthy


PostPosted: Sat Dec 18, 2004 9:10 pm    Post subject: Re: Life Learnings Reply with quote

Schultzy89GTA wrote:
This may be stale for some of you but I thought I would post anyway. I think that most of us reading this board can relate to #3. #2 is just way to close to my professional life for my comfort Wink


Things That Took Me Over 30 Years to Learn by Dave Barry

1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, nor will it ever achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings".

3. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."

4. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share
yours with them.

5. You should not confuse your career with your life.

6. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

7. Never lick a steak knife.

8. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.

9. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we
observe daylight savings time.

10. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

11. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.

12. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion,
economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.

13. A person, who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person. (This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails.)

14. Your friends love you anyway.

15. Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.

16. Men are like fine wine they start out as grapes, and it's up to the women to stomp the crap out of them until they turn into someone acceptable with whom to have dinner.


-Schultzy

1 ~ never had the urge... but i bet its somethings akin to eating really undercooked meat and being drunk at the same time.
2 ~ true story
3 ~ also true. That one does it for me Wink (course we all know I have mental illnesseses)
4 ~ undeniably true
5 ~ unpossible... my career has gotten me much further in my life than my life ever got me Surprised
6 ~ I get funny looks at work for it, but I do it anyway.
7 ~ I lick steakknives all the time
8 ~ I disagree... it is most definitely my farts. Ask anyone. They're absolutely revolting
9 ~ Thats because no one asks the penguins
10 ~ not my fault she lied about being on the shot.
err... oh.

O_o

11 ~ I kind of agree... shizzle gets disappointing after about that age anyway Wink

12 ~ yup... and have the accidents to prove it Wink

13 ~ what about a person who is nice to the waiter but rude to you? O_o

14 ~ could have fooled me

15 ~ yup

16 ~ its true... my girlfriend has completely changed how I am in a restaurant... I have actual ettiquette and shizzle...

but I still fart in restaurants... if I'm uncomfortable everyone else should be too Very Happy

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Dewey316
The Lama


Joined: 08 Jan 2004
Posts: 7295
Location: Bringing the tech

1990 Chevrolet Camaro RS

PostPosted: Sat Dec 18, 2004 9:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Twilightoptics wrote:
I dig #15. Amatuers rock! Hooray for the youngin's! Cool


Noah was not exactly a 'youngin' when he built the ark. Wink

But, amatuers rock! Rock on!
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Demon
12sec Club


Joined: 09 Jan 2004
Posts: 1189
Location: You're not worthy


PostPosted: Sat Dec 18, 2004 10:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Dewey316 wrote:
Twilightoptics wrote:
I dig #15. Amatuers rock! Hooray for the youngin's! Cool


Noah was not exactly a 'youngin' when he built the ark. Wink

But, amatuers rock! Rock on!
though that may be true... he's still the main reason for animal inbreeding.
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Twilightoptics
Hardcore (12sec Club)


Joined: 13 Jan 2004
Posts: 9191
Location: Auburn , WA

1987 Chevrolet Camaro IROC-Z

PostPosted: Sun Dec 19, 2004 12:23 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Demon wrote:
Dewey316 wrote:
Twilightoptics wrote:
I dig #15. Amatuers rock! Hooray for the youngin's! Cool


Noah was not exactly a 'youngin' when he built the ark. Wink

But, amatuers rock! Rock on!
though that may be true... he's still the main reason for animal inbreeding.


What the hell Aaron? That was uncalled for.
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Demon
12sec Club


Joined: 09 Jan 2004
Posts: 1189
Location: You're not worthy


PostPosted: Thu Dec 23, 2004 9:44 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Twilightoptics wrote:
Demon wrote:
Dewey316 wrote:
Twilightoptics wrote:
I dig #15. Amatuers rock! Hooray for the youngin's! Cool


Noah was not exactly a 'youngin' when he built the ark. Wink

But, amatuers rock! Rock on!
though that may be true... he's still the main reason for animal inbreeding.


What the hell Aaron? That was uncalled for.
not from a logical standpoint it isn't... if you only have two of each animal, obviously they'll inbreed after the first pairing have mated. It's just nature taking its course.

same goes for the adam and eve theory as well IMO.

granted, the animals didn't drown anyone or have a movie made about them or anything Surprised

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